The Rules

Time-tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right

By: Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider

You know, Don't accept a Saturday Night Date after Wednesday (Rule 7). SyMall.com asked me to review it. The information clerk at Barnes & Noble told me to go to  the self-improvement section, then relationships. I looked around to make sure I didn't see anyone I knew. It's not the adult video section, but still Found The Rules between Why Men Are  The Way They Are and How to Heal a Painful Relationship. Is there a message their or what? The clerk said,

?Suppose he?s Mr. Right but it?s Thursday?? She continued, ?If I find a great guy, I throw him to the floor and nail him.? How do you compete with that?

Welcome to the authors? Some-Enchanted-Evening theory of capturing a man. (You will see a stranger across a crowded room. He?ll fly to your side and make you his own.) Right. The plan is simple enough: you want to be married, so you eliminate all married men. Then you eliminate all unmarried men who are not interested in you. (Actually, they eliminate you, but let?s not quibble.) Then, since all men like a challenge, you become elusive and mysterious and men pursue you. You are the red cape; he is the bull.
 
But, it turns out, as Princess Di once said, there are three people in this relationship. And the Rottweiler turns out to be the person you were before the authors got hold of you and convinced you to become a ?Creature Unlike Any Other.? ?Don?t let him know you?re afraid to be alone, to be without a man,? they say. ?Don?t be an empty vessel waiting for him to fill you up, support you, give you a life?don?t babble on and on?don?t make the man a savior or therapist? don?t be desperate? anxious? jealous? insecure? aggressive? angry? a pain-in-the-neck.? The authors do not have a high opinion of these women. ?Don?t even say hello first to your doorman. The person who talks the most has the most to loose.? Don?t even think of mentioning AA, surgical scars, Prozac.

So what do they advise you to do to become this ?Creature Unlike Any Other?? ?Just get a life. Be independent?enthusiastic?engaged in work? busy? happy? living fully on you own.? So far, so good. ?Don?t lie. Evade.? Evade? Then, on the line between stalker and recluse, they continue heading for recluse. ?Be indifferent?a little distant and difficult. Don?t call him. Don?t bring up marriage or the future.? At this rate, you may not get a chance.

And what do the authors think of men? They like men entirely. They accept men as they are, completely. And if you know what?s good for you, you will too. As they say, ?You don?t own him. Don?t fix him.? However, they point out that ?the man is the adversary. And he loves a challenge.? More than sex? ?Let him do all the thinking,? they say. ?Men love the seemingly unattainable girl.? More than sex?
 
By: Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider